


Of Baseball Bats and Bagels

by cthink



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Ashton loves calum, Cashton, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, One Shot, Only a teeny tiny bit of violence, SO MUCH FLUFF, bagels lol, cashton is rising mark my words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-15
Updated: 2016-07-15
Packaged: 2018-07-24 03:58:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7492914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cthink/pseuds/cthink
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bang!</p><p>Ashton jerked awake, shooting to sit upright in his bed as his bleary mind struggled to process what was going on. His legs were tangled in the sheets as he blinked sleepily, rubbing at his bleary eyes before he was shocked still by yet another loud bang.</p><p>Or, alternatively, the one where the burglar downstairs turns out not to be much of a burglar at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Baseball Bats and Bagels

**Author's Note:**

> So this was based on a tumblr prompt (which I've since lost, of course) and idk it just screamed cashton to me, this is so cheesy and I hate it but whatever here you go

_Bang!_

Ashton jerked awake, shooting to sit upright in his bed as his bleary mind struggled to process what was going on. His legs were tangled in the sheets as he blinked sleepily, rubbing at his bleary eyes before he was shocked still by yet another loud bang.

His breath hitched in his throat, hands coming to rest back by his sides as he shuffled carefully in the bed. He waited with baited breath for the noise to come again, casting a quick glance to the side to check his alarm clock - 01:26. Jesus, it was too late to be up. After a minute when nothing could be heard, he slowly reclined in the bed, turning on his side before he was comfortable once more, deciding that his sleep-fuddled mind had imagined it.

Rest only came to him for a few minutes before he heard it again.

_Bang!_

Followed by a muffled shuffling. Definitely downstairs. His heart thudded in his chest as he quickly got back up again, socked feet quiet on the wooden floor. He could definitely hear footsteps now, loud and clear. Briefly, Ashton considered the possibility that it could be Calum, but Calum had said he was staying at Michael and Luke's for the night after they all went out together - Ashton had politely declined the invite, claiming he needed some alone time. Which was true, because they'd been touring non-stop and everyone needed a break every once in a while. _This_ \- was not Ashton's idea of alone time.

Turning on the spot as an idea struck him, he made his way to the corner of the darkened room, the only light the moonbeams filtering in through the slats of the blinds, where he blindly reached out for the baseball bat he knew was propped against the wall there, the one he'd bought last time they went to America with the name of some city written on the side Ashton was too tired to remember. It'd been for souvenir purposes - at least, that was what he'd claimed, but they'd stayed in some relatively dodgy hotels in their careers, and it was always better safe than sorry. Ashton silently thanked himself for ignoring Michael's teasing and buying it, regardless.

Shuffling back towards the door, with only the sound of shuffling and the anxious blood rushing in his ears, Ashton tightened his sweaty grip on the wooden bat and inched closer to the door, shaky fingers reaching out to grip the cool metal handle and pulling it slowly open. He winced as it creaked, but the banging and shuffling downstairs failed to cease, and so he could only assume he was, thus far, undetected.

Some of his curls fell into his face when he jumped, yet another loud bang sounding down the corridor that he and Calum had yet to properly furnish given the little time they actually spent at their LA apartment. It was dark, and so, fumbling, he reached out to feel his way down to the kitchen where most of the noise seemed to be coming from, bracing himself against the wall. Ashton wasn't afraid to admit that he was scared - shit scared. He could die, this could be the end, he might never see any of the others again, and all because of some damn burglar. Who burgled a kitchen, anyway?

Floorboards remained true underneath his feet, failing to creak even once, and Ashton thanked his lucky stars that Calum had had the foresight to make sure that they were sturdy when they picked out the apartment together. Ashton still remembered that day like it was yesterday.

How Calum had smiled and thrown his arms around Ashton's neck in an excited embrace as he confirmed that they'd take the apartment, and how that night they'd celebrated with Luke and Michael and more pizza than any of them could stomach (yet somehow Michael still managed, of course), and Ashton had faked homesickness just so Calum would invite him into his own bed for the night - and maybe he'd been a little drunk. Only a little, though.

Ashton didn't want to die without Calum knowing how he really felt. God, everything the younger boy did set Ashton's heart beating at twice the pace, and naturally, living with him had become somewhat a challenge - being forced to witness Calum in all his morning glory every single day they spent here, sleep-tousled dark curls and long glowing limbs and all. But, as difficult as it had become for Ashton to suppress everything he felt, he wouldn't change it for the world. Who would? Calum was just so... _Calum_. Beautiful, amazing, funny-

_Bang!_

Shit. Ashton had forgotten all about that. With the image of Calum still lingering in his brain (and he was glad of that, because if he was going to die he wanted that to be the last thing he ever saw), he came to the end, feet treading lightly on the stairs as he peered around the corner, raising his bat up, ready to strike. He'd never used the bat once in his life, but there was a first time for everything.

Ashton frowned as he was met with an empty room, though, the white tiles of the floor and marble counters glinting in the moonlight from the windows. But other than that, the room was pitch black, and confusingly deserted. Only once he was sure the coast was clear did Ashton huff, letting the baseball bat swing back down to his side as he stepped properly into the kitchen. It must've just been a door, or a window that'd been left open, or-

As Ashton turned, instead of the main door to the apartment, he was met with a dark figure - blurry in the low light from the apartment. It was over in a split second, though - Ashton cried out in fear as soon as he realised that no, the kitchen wasn't empty, and he brought the baseball bat down, hard, to be met with a satisfying clunk and a surprised yelp as the intruder fell to the cold tiled floor, seemingly unconscious. Ashton still could barely see anything other than a dark shape against the bright floor, though, and panting, he let the bat drop fully to the floor with a clatter that, even though he'd caused it, made him jump once again.

He bit his knuckle, mind struggling to keep up with what had happened and what the hell he was supposed to do, now, before he decided that the best thing to do would be to shed a little light on the situation - literally. Skirting around the limp form on the floor, warily, he crossed the kitchen to where the light switch was located, flicking them all on and illuminating the entire floor of the house, too confused to even be able to process which switch was the one for the kitchen.

He shielded his eyes almost immediately as the lights flicked on, blindingly bright for such an hour of the morning, but after he'd blinked a few times, he allowed his gaze to fall back to the figure in the floor, patches of his vision fuzzy from where the light had temporarily stunned him.

The person was dressed in a large jumper, sweatpants on, and from what Ashton could see, had dark skin and curly dark hair. Dark skin and curly dark hair. Dark skin, and...curly dark hair. Shit. Please, no. Please, please, _please_. No.

A bagel lay on the ground near where the person was sprawled out, too - seemingly half-eaten and spread with vegemite, apparently having been dropped in the minor scuffle.

Ashton could feel his heart sink, the pace quickening again. What kind of burglar stole a bagel (after having gone to the effort of spreading it with vegemite)? They didn't. Burglars didn't do that. Bile lingering in his throat, Ashton moved forward to nudge the suspect with his foot. Naturally, they remained still on the floor.

It could be a mistake, though! Maybe it was all a big mistake. Maybe it _was_ a burglar. A burglar, who, stole bagels from kitchens instead of anything of actual worth, and a burglar who wore exactly the same clothes and had exactly the same curly dark hair (now slightly clotted at the back with what looked sickeningly like, and most definitely was, thick crimson blood) as his best friend...as Calum. It wasn't Calum, though. It couldn't be.

Kneeling down, gingerly, undeniably afraid of what he'd find, Ashton took the persons shoulder in his hand, using it to roll him over.

Okay - okay, maybe the burglar just had exactly the same face as Calum, too, or something - a doppelgänger, right? You got those, didn't you?

It was Calum, though. His head span as he tried to reach any other conclusion than the fact that he'd just accidentally knocked out his best friend and secret crush of over five years, but it was definitely Calum. He just looked as if he was sleeping, really, but that didn't stop Ashton from throwing up into the sink, his body and mind immediately wracked with guilt. He'd hit Calum. He'd hit Calum. He knew he was overreacting, but, oh god, he'd hit Calum and knocked him out.

"Jesus fucking Christ!" He whisper shouted, tugging at his hair. What'd he done? He fucking looked after Calum, _loved_ Calum, and he'd hit him unconscious. He straightened up, pacing before stopping suddenly, and kneeling back down to Calum again, and then pacing again, repeating over and over in a vicious cycle until the phone suddenly rang out through the otherwise silent apartment, and for what felt like the millionth time that night, Ashton jumped out of his skin, startled and brain starting to fall into overdrive for too many paranoid conclusions for him to keep count of. Maybe someone knew what he'd done, or maybe they were going to ask how Calum, was, and-

He grabbed it off the stand before he could hesitate any longer.

"Hey-" Michael "-Cal, is that you? Sorry to ring the home phone but you weren't picking up- uh, you kinda left your jacket and-"

"Mike-"

"Ash? What're you doing up?"

"Mike, Calum's..."

"Calum's what?" Ashton remained silent. "What is he, Ashton? Ashton?"

"I fucking hit him thinking he was a burglar, or something, with a baseball bat, and now he's lying on the floor and he's unconscious or some shit and his heads bleeding and I think he was just getting a bagel and now I don't know what to do-" he blurted out all at once, only stopping for a breath at the end, a strangled noise escaping his throat instead.

The two of them fell into a silence - a seemingly stunned one, at Michaels end, and a panicked one at Ashton's, before - Michael started laughing.

It was a giggle, and Ashton could practically smell the alcohol on his breath even over the phone, but it surprised him nonetheless, mouth hanging open slightly, involuntarily, until Michael was seemingly crying with laughter on the other end, and Ashton could hear a voice that sounded suspiciously like Luke's in the background, muffled but evidently amused. Michael did have a particularly contagious laugh - only not in the given situation. Despite the younger's incessant wheezing, Ashton still wanted to cry.

"What do I do?" He pleaded desperately, almost angrily, and he heard Michael trying to force himself to stop laughing, could almost see him wiping the tears from his eyes right that second. "It isn't funny," he snapped, and Michael chuckled.

"Alright, alright, I'm sorry," he said sincerely, yet Ashton could still hear the smile in his voice. "Just...put an ice pack on his head and hold it there until he wakes up, okay? It's probably gonna sting like a bitch in the morning."

Ashton whined, but nodded anyway, briefly forgetting that Michael couldn't see him. "Okay. Thanks," he breathed, still staring at Calum on the floor, moving the phone away slowly to hang up when Michael didn't reply. Just before he could, though-

"Oh, and, Ash?"

"Yeah?"

"Take a picture," Michael said with a giggle, before promptly hanging up. Ashton grumbled to himself, before slinging the phone back onto the hook with a sigh. There wasn't a chance in hell he was taking a picture. Didn't even have his phone on him, anyway. He liked to take photos of Calum, of course - did it at any given opportunity, in fact, because Calum really just was that photogenic and ethereal - but now really, really wasn't the time.

Instead, he decided that the kitchen floor wasn't exactly the best place for Calum to remain, and, still a little shaky, scooped him up and plonked him on the couch, not trusting himself to carry him any further. Calum was surprisingly light, but ridiculously lanky, and Ashton was grateful for the giant soft sofas they'd bought, because the younger boy fit easily on, legs fully stretched out across the cushions. Ashton just couldn't stop feeling guilty, though. He knew it was really nothing to be worried about, and that Calum would probably laugh about it once he woke up, just as Michael had, but then he saw the tiny patch of blood on the back of Calum's head and reminded himself that he'd hurt him, and felt anxiety clawing at and constricting his airways.

Regardless, he blundered on, reluctantly leaving Calum where he was curled up on the sofa to go and dig through the contents of their freezer. Now, he knew for sure that they didn't have an ice pack, but eventually he decided that a bag of frozen peas would do. Hovering back next to the sofa awkwardly, he rested on his haunches and pressed the icepack gingerly to the back of Calum's head, wincing as he did subconsciously.

"Jesus," he muttered, sighing shakily as he pressed it down a little firmer. Calum squirmed about and frowned a bit in his sleep, and Ashton felt even worse than he already had until he reminded himself that he was doing this for Calum's own good. He remained like that for what felt like hours but really must've been mere minutes, horrified to find himself drifting off every so often, head nodding and subsequently shooting back up when his chin hit his chest, only for him to remind himself that it wasn't even two o'clock yet; his eyes ached to keep open.

It was then that Ashton realised that as much as he wanted to, he probably wouldn't be able to stay awake all night, and his hand was already beginning to slip from its place on Calum's head, his fingers numb from the cold peas, and so he quickly ran to the doorway where he knew he'd left his scarf (despite not actually needing it at all in the scorching American heat, but again, better safe than sorry), and brought it back and carefully wrapped it around Calum's head, tying the peas in place. Calum looked ridiculous, like some sort of ninja warrior, and Ashton allowed himself one little snicker before he sunk back down onto the floor, resting his head on his forearm as he let his fingers tiredly brush the skin of the back of Calum's hand where it lay limply next to him, and leaned down ever so slightly to tug one of the big fluffy throws Calum had bought when they'd first moved in over the both of them, settling down once more, and drifting off until he was as still as Calum.

_Pop!_

Fuck, was Ashton getting tired of waking up to loud noises. He jerked awake, sun now filtering in to the living room, his head still resting where he'd left it on his forearm, only now he was surrounded by...peas? Hundreds of the little green balls were moving around him, falling onto the floor with little thunks, and Ashton was sure he was drunk or high until he felt someone's presence next to him, and looked up to see Calum with Ashton's scarf over his eyes from where it'd apparently slipped down from his forehead overnight, and a half empty bag of peas stuck to the side of his head, and Ashton reasoned that it must've popped when Calum rolled over in his sleep, or something, because now Calum had jerked up too and was looking around in blind confusion, and Ashton burst into hysterics at the sight, his guilt from the previous night apparently having faded with sleep.

"Ashton?" He heard Calum croak, and regained his composure - although unable to keep from chuckling - to reach up and tug the makeshift blindfold from Calum's eyes, the rest of the peas tumbling out of the packet and spinning in all directions across the floor. Calum squinted, watching them go before he looked up at Ashton, his eyes puzzled as Ashton continued to giggle. Ashton softened at that, moving to sit up next to him on the couch, patting Calum's legs for him to make room. Calum curled up before pushing himself up, eyes squeezing shut with a groan as one hand came up to his head, and Ashton started to feel bad again.

"Why am I on the couch?" The younger boy asked sleepily, yawning and wincing once more. Ashton supposed that what must've already been a killer hangover didn't exactly mix well with a baseball bat to the head.  
"Heh...about that..." Ashton smiled sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck as Calum looked at him confusedly.  
"Uh...well, what's the last thing you remember?" He asked, and Calum turned to stare at the floor, biting his lip, evidently deep in thought.

"Uh....I got home...and then...you were asleep, so I went to bed, but then I was kinda hungry and so I went down and got like, a bagel, or something?" He looked at Ashton like he was checking, and so Ashton just nodded and Calum's frown deepened. "But then...I don't know. I don't remember anymore. All I know is that my head fucking kills, man..." Calum said, reaching up to touch the back of his head and wincing, retracting it quickly. "Is there blood in my hair?" He asked, surprised, and Ashton bit his lip, averting his eyes from Calum and nodding.

"Ashton..." Calum squinted suspiciously, and Ashton sighed.  
"Well...I dunno, I didn't think you'd be coming back, and so I heard this banging downstairs and I thought we'd been...broken into, or something? And so I kinda...got my baseball bat, and, it was dark and you were just kinda there, and....and I'm really sorry, Cal, I swear I didn't mean to, like one minute you were there and the next you were on the floor and oh god, I-"  
"You knocked me out?"  
"Uh...yeah. I guess I did. Sorry about that-"  
"What did you do with my bagel?"  
"I know, I'm so sorry-...wait, what?"  
"My bagel? Where is it?" Calum craned his neck, eyes scouting the room and kitchen, and Ashton just blinked at him.  
"You mean...you don't care? You're not mad?"  
Calum just turned to him and scoffed. "Of course I don't care! I mean, it does fucking hurt- only a little bit, though!" He quickly added when Ashton started to look ashamed again. "But it's not that bad. It's pretty fucking funny, actually. I'm starving though. Where's my bagel?"  
"I, uh...I binned it. Sorry."  
Calum raised an eyebrow, like he was waiting for something, and it took a moment before Ashton's eyes widened in realisation.  
"On it," he said, standing up far too quickly and making his head spin, before hurrying to the kitchen and quickly throwing a bagel together with the vegemite on extra thick, just like how Calum liked it.

Calum smiled happily when Ashton passed him the bagel on a plate, and he slid some painkillers and a glass of water onto the big glass coffee table just in case he wanted it.

"I'm sorry, Cal," he said softly, pulling the younger boy in for a side hug and kissing the top of his curly head as Calum munched happily away.  
"'S alright, Ash, 'm not mad," he spoke through a mouthful, "could never be mad at you."  
"Hmm?" Ashton said, a teasing lilt to his voice, but his heart stopped beating in his chest when Calum turned to him from where he was tucked snugly into Ashton's side, his big brown eyes full of sincerity as he finished his mouthful-  
"I love you," he explained simply, and Ashton felt the air being punched out of him. He blinked at him wordlessly, right in the eyes, waiting for Calum to just grin and laugh it off and call him bro, or something, but he didn't, and so, slightly breathlessly, he whispered back,

"I love you too, Cal." He waited for Calum to tell him it was a joke or something, once again - but, once again, he didn't. Just smiled happily and nodded, pressing a soft, shy kiss to the corner of Ashton's mouth, before taking another bite of of his bagel like nothing had even happened, snuggling down further into Ashton's side. Ashton was silent, trying to process what had just happened. He couldn't. But he put that down to Calum simply being the most incredible, confusing, amazing person he'd ever met - and he smiled to himself, wrapping an arm around Calum's shoulder and tugging him closer. He laughed slightly, so quietly Calum didn't appear to hear, when he thought about what had actually happened - apparently, if you want a good way to confess your eternal and undying love to someone who you've adored for years as _just friends_ , that certain person being Calum Hood - you hit them round the head with a baseball bat.

**Author's Note:**

> I hate the ending so much lol but please let me know if you enjoyed xx


End file.
